12.20.2010

It hit me like a brick

I sat at my desk this morning doing the usual stuff I do on a Monday morning.
Nothing was really unusual about today.
And my phone rang. It was Evan.
The conversation was not an unusual occurrence.
But the topic was one we have managed to avoid for some time now.
Cancer.

This January 19th will mark 1 year since the surgery.
The surgery where Evan's thyroid went away.
The surgery that ended up being the removal of a cancerous tumor.
The surgery that came out of nowhere and left us all stunned.

With the one year mark comes a whole new battery of tests.
For the first time ever, Evan will have a PET scan.
Something I have been wanting him to have and finally he has a doctor that thinks it's a necessity.
He also has tons of bloodwork, a series of Thyrogen shots, a dose of radioactive iodine and a full body scan.
All in one week at the beginning of February.

That's what we talked about.
We talked about something that is in the future, but is not anticipated.
As much as I can't wait to hear the results of a clean PET and body scan (because I know they will be clean!), there is a big part of me that wishes this was not a part of our normal.

We have been told by countless doctors that Evan will be monitored forever. Every 6 months and maybe at some point every year. That's the new normal.
And it's not that I mind making sure he is watched and is healthy. I don't mind at all.
There is just part of me that is very angry about having our lives stop for cancer.

And it is in these times that I have to remind myself of all that God has shown us because of Evan having cancer. I have to remember the people we have met, the lives that have been changed and the love that has grown because of cancer.

So we will be busy again in February at Emory. Making sure the love of my life is healthy.
Meeting with doctors and planning the future.
And in advance I ask for your prayers leading up to this time.
It is with our friends and family and of course our God that we have gotten through this past year. And we will need that same support going forward.
This journey will never be over.
But with this journey, the opportunities for growth and love are endless.

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