I Do

A few weeks ago during our sermon at church, our minister asked a few questions that have been resonating with me for days now. One in particular has really had me thinking lately-
"When do a man and woman officially become married?"
The obvious choices for an answer are 1. when the certificate is signed, 2. when the minister declares it, 3. when two become one in flesh, and so on.
But I'd like to put a different spin on this question.
First, let me say that I believe Evan and I became a married couple when we stood before God and everyone close to us and said our vows to one another.
But I also believe that for the first 11 years of our marriage, we took for granted being a married couple. I'm not saying that we didn't have a great marriage- it has been pretty solid. I'm just saying it became real this year.
And by real I don't mean that we have wasted 11 years. I'm just saying we have taken the 11 years we've had and finally totally surrendered ourselves to each other and to God.
Trust me, I know this all sounds strange. But I wanted you to understand that this year has absolutely changed our lives forever. And I wouldn't give back a second of what we have been through as a family. Because we are finally whole.
I have learned to love like I have never loved before. I was not raised with the understanding that it is ok to totally devote yourself to the care of others. It was really all about me.
But God has shown me that it's not about me.
Right now it's about get Evan healthy and being the best woman I can be for my family.
And I know I can't do that alone.
I am a complete turd.
But I can not even tell you how much I have grown and changed to the point that I almost feel like I am a completely new being.
All by the grace of God.
And I can't speak for Evan, but I would venture to say that he would tell you that he is the same way. I can tell you that he is as devoted as ever to me. And he lives every day with one intention- being the best person he can be.
The crazy thing is I'm not sure that any of this could have happened without cancer entering our lives. It took us being completely broken in order to be completely restored.
And we are restored.
We are finally a married couple in every sense of the phrase.
And we could not be happier.